Wednesday, April 27, 2005

Mental Pulp on Hump Day

More like Mental Mush...

...When you try to give your phone number to an uber-hot chick in the parking lot of Snookies, and you completely forget your own home phone number, you can chalk it up to being as nervous as a seventeen year old. When you carry around a sheet of note pad paper in order to jot down journal topics during the day, you're losing it...

Family Entertainment

Congress and the Presidential administration are trying to carry a bill to law enabling U.S. households to use a new software, presumably for DVR units, which filters live and recorded media for content. A good Idea for families, not for this cinemaphile. When the 175 minute epic "The Godfather" is viewed with all filters, such as "Sexual content", "Nudity", "Language", "Violence", "Mild reference to deity", and "Strong reference to deity" activated, the film would last exactly four minutes and fifty eight seconds...

Down with the Sickness

Our company specializes in Homopolymers, Laminates, Thermoplastics, and Thermosets for use in defense and aerospace applications; however, every couple of months we get a yokel off of the street in the place wanting to purchase 'commodities' plastics such as acrylic or polycarbonate for use as windows in his deer blind or whatever. One such gent, who comes in every couple of months is Lai Peng, an old guy who looks and speaks like Uncle Benny from Lethal Weapon 4. JW is making fun of his very, very thick accent to his face all through the facility:

JW: So you are looking for PETG in sheet, rod, or tube?

Peng: Yes, yes.

JW: Um, in sheet, rod, or tube?

Peng: Yes, yes. PETG.

JW: (using hand gestures now) In Sheet.....Rod......or Tube. (I had to point out later that JW looked like he was grasping a cock on the last one.)

Peng: Ahh Sheet.

JW: What sickness are you needing?

Peng: Very sin. Sickness must be .062 inch.

JW: Ok. We're getting somewhere. Here is our PETG. .062 sickness is the third bin up...


I had to leave the area before I lost it. I was waiting for him to ask Peng if he wanted flied lice with it...

WTF? Distinguished my ASS.

While washing my hands in MY bathroom at work, I became instantly horrified. You see, when you lean over to get your hands under the faucet, which is located over a basin attached directly to the wall, with the mirror directly above it, you come in very close contact to the mirror, say five or six inches. While washing I look up to see what? All these gray hairs at the temples. Colossal anxiety attack ensues.

Question.

How does, in a section of I-75 where it is two lanes each direction divided by a barrier of concrete and steel ten feet high, does a car wind up upside down and pointing the opposite direction of that lane's direction of travel?

A great shirt.

Imagine the symbols, because my keyboard doesn't have some of them.

Square Root symbol over 69 equals 8-something.

1 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Nirmala PET A Pack Pvt. Ltd. offer APET Sheet, PETG Sheet from India.

May 8, 2009 at 11:29 PM  

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